Posted in Finance, Relationships

Money, Finances, and Retirement

These 3 items often give people an upset stomach when talking about the future and planning.

My parents were budgeters… not bc they enjoyed it, but because they didn’t have the means to be extravagant.  I grew up in two parent working household and that was to make ends meet.  I was extremely fortunate that my parents valued my future, and it was evidenced in how they spent and saved their money.  Home cooked meals were the norm — until I started in activities that kept me at lessons or practice from the time school recessed until the late evening.  I never dove into the sacrifices they made nor the financial understanding of what they were doing.  I’ve learned a lot from how they spent their money, and it’s something I want to pass on to my kid(s).

When I look around at people and their spending habits, I’m appalled at what they purchase.  Eating meals out every night…. buying tons of clothes/makeup/shoes…. these are just some of the things that just seem to be wasteful to me.  Do I do it?  Yes, but minimally.  Do I think about it every time and wonder if it’s worth it?  Absolutely.  But, it’s never too late to start a plan or get on track to be financially savvy or responsible.

Helpful links to tackle:

x-books-about-money

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Posted in Family, Life, Relationships, Review, travel, Wedding

2017 in Review

A brief year in review…

January 2017 was a stressful month for us as we were getting ready for our February wedding.  I remember the calls, appointments, dress try-ons, tastings, dance lessons, etc… there was always something to do or plan.

Our wedding on February 4, 2017 went off without a hitch.  It was such a wonderful day and it seemed to be a fun time had by all!  We had a mini-moon to Santa Barbara right after our wedding for a couple of days.

We celebrated Ross’ bday in Mammoth with a group of friends.  It had been years since both of us had snowboarded, but it was a great time for all and no one broke anything!  Such a fun time and group of people!!

Ross and I dabbled in skateboarding and ukulele.  We got some awesome Carver skateboards that’s supposed to simulate surfing on land — Ross is a natural and has enjoyed skateboarding with me while I take a walk around the neighborhood.  The ukulele has been a musical love of mine for a while and I finally pulled the trigger to get more into it.  My piano and violin background have helped in picking it up… the uke is such a happy and portable instrument!

We took our main honeymoon at the end of April to South Africa and the Maldives. Check out our itinerary here!

After we got back from our honeymoon, both Ross and I were extremely drained.  We weren’t sure if it was from the jet lag or work (this had not happened to us before and we had made multiple international flights before!).  Little did we know that time of conception may have been somewhere around mid-May 2017!

And the biggest news of 2017 — our pregnancy!

We had a fun trip to Seattle in July (The Mini was 8 weeks!) to wine taste (this trip was booked before we found out about the pregnancy), watch a concert (Train and some others), stay in a yurt, and SUP the waterways of Washington!

Our last big trip of the year –> the Azores!  We traveled when I was 16 and 17 weeks pregnant, which was a good time!  It was the last time I would surf for this pregnancy as my belly was starting to get in the way of laying on my stomach for a paddle.

We started looking at a small house remodel by adding an accessory dwelling unit to our first floor with a separate entrance.  We made plans with the architect and interior decorator, however, once we got our permits submitted to the city…. we discovered they wanted a lofty fee for an accessory dwelling unit that wasn’t mandated by state law.  We’re hoping this fee gets amended or better yet dropped as we have our permits for a year.  So time will tell!

NYE was a busy day!  I worked from 7a-5:30p and then went out to a nice 7p dinner with my bear at our first date spot Cucina Enoteca.  We got home around 9ish and tried to stay up but we passed out on the couch from then until midnight!  Thank goodness for DVR bc we could rewind the NY ball drop and watch it and celebrate!  We opted for a new year tradition: planting one tree/plant (indoor or outdoor) each year!  This year we planted three indoor palms (chamaedorea costaricana, howea forsteriana, chambeyronia macro) and one outdoor palm (from our wedding: the blue green palm — butia capitata blue).

Happy New Year!!

Posted in Life, Relationships, work

The vicious cycle of negativity

I’ve noticed a trend between late nights at work, being tired, and a vicious cycle of negativity.  My temper kicks in, my fuse shortens, and I’m ready to brawl any chance the situation presents itself.  But that’s not me.  What the heck?

Let’s start with lack of sleep:

Effects of Sleep Deprivation on the Body

Negativity

It’s so much easier being negative than taking the time to look at the positive side of things.  I’m a realist so the positive BS gets a bit thick for me.  I’m not outright rude to people, but I certainly don’t go out of my way to sugarcoat things.  In today’s world, I do feel people need better coping skills.  Does that make me a cold hearted snake?  No, I don’t think so.  I just think I’ve seen things and dealt with things that have made me stronger.  Perhaps I’m out of touch.

Realizing lack of work-life balance

If 40 hours/week is the magical number for work-life balance and being able to maintain “full-time” status… I’m well over that.  Perhaps the lack of being able to make my own hours is another imbalance.  I’m a servant to my pager and to my hospital duties.   Don’t feel sorry for me; I knew that going into healthcare.  Is work-life balance an illusion?

Empathy

But maybe this is what needs improving.  As I get older, it’s harder and harder for me to find sympathy and feel empathy in situations.  I don’t have any concrete examples coming to mind, but I find myself believing that people got themselves into a particular situation without a thought of consequences.  There seems to be a huge movement for being in the present — quite honestly, I wouldn’t mind if people had the thoughtfulness to think of the present while also keeping an eye on the future.

I stumbled upon the idea of transference.  Interesting article here about what it is and how it alters your perspective on life.

Needing an outlet

But what if it’s the challenge of being close that can be so emotionally charging?  Maybe it’s the lack of honest accurate communication?

Posted in Life, Relationships

7 Relationships That Will Change Your Life

I completely agree with the article below.  It really opens yourself to learning about others and how it may differ from your own personal situation.  Fantastic read!

Written By Millionaire’s Digest Team Member: Ann Hall Founder & Owner of: A Coffee with Friends Millionaire’s Digest Team, Contributor, Family & Life and Travel Writer I have lived life in the jungles with long periods of time in isolation which has changed my life and perspective on many things but one greater than all is […]

via 7 Relationships that Will Change Your Life (2 min read) — Millionaire’s Digest

Posted in Family, Kids, Life, Relationships, travel, Wedding

Our wedding – Feb 4, 2017

The best day ever.

Our AppyCouple wedding website

Our Wedding Pinterest Board

Our Honeyfund

 


Our Wedding Day
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Bridal Veil: Mia Bella Couture
Bridesmaids: Vow to Be Chic
Cake: VG Donuts
DJ: Elite British DJ (Mick)
Rings: Brilliant Diamonds – Tacori (Ariel)
Wedding Planner: I do weddings (Melissa)
First Dance choreography:  Wedding Dance San Diego (Liz O’Grady)
Photo: True Photography (Billy)
Video: Campbellicious (KC)
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Posted in Life, Relationships

Happiness

What makes one happy?

There’s a ton of articles on what makes people happy.  But that’s such a generalization.  It seems difficult to me to apply one general rule to a population only to glaze over the various individual emotions/behavior of one person…much less a group.

Sometimes these articles say “fake it til you make it”.  That only lasts for so long.  Or they say express “gratitude” — tell that to someone who is dying from cancer or suffering from a long-term illness…  tell that to the parent who just lost a child…. tell that to the guy who just got fired…. c’mon!  At times it strikes me that the people writing these articles have never been through hardship.  It makes me want to strangle them because their inability to relate and give advice is like a slap in the face to people who are truly struggling in adverse circumstances.

I’m a happy-go-lucky gal in daily life.  I do give my best effort in looking at the positive things in life (instead of the negative).  There are so many people with so much more going on in their lives that are challenges — whether it’s physical, emotional, spiritual, etc.  Lately, I haven’t been my happy self.  I’m not sure what’s the reason.  Nothing has really changed.  Things at work are great.  I just got back from a fabulous vacation with my fiancé.  I’m tackling new hobbies.  But I can’t seem to dig myself up and out of this rut that I’m going through.

So as much as I’d love to take the advice of these articles…

I only related to the last two.

Looking forward to a new season…..